The Definition of Insanity Is Me

Albert Einstein once said the definition of insanity is doing the same thing over and over and expecting different results. I can argue that I'm the quintessential poster girl for the definition of insanity. My most recent example is that frequently I will get the notion to clean out my craft closet that is fuller than Fibber McGee's by tossing everything out into the middle of the floor, sorting a few things to give away or throw away and end up throwing everything back into the closet because I'm too tired to finish thereby making it look worse than it did when I started. This happens every stinkin' time. Not this time, by golly. No, this time I'm bound and determined to do something besides stuff it all back. (I know what you're thinking.)

What brought about this sudden change, you ask? Well, I'll tell ya. I got tired of never knowing what I have in there or where anything is. I have enough wrapping paper and gift bags to last a lifetime because I can never find what I need and end up buying more.

Our granddaughter asked me to use my 'fancy' machine (as she called it) to embroider on her new scrubs and I had to almost empty the closet to find the machine and all the attachments, etc., I needed to do the job. That was the last straw. I tossed everything out to get to it and didn't want to just dump it all back in there, so I have no choice but to clean it this time. After all that work, I ended up chickening out on embroidering her scrubs. Oh, well.

I need to get it finished before the fella who will be installing our new internet comes tomorrow morning. This decision came from the Queen of Procrastination after only four years of waffling and a little nag...requesting from David. The chances of my finishing the job that quickly is about as good as my winning more than $29 when I play the lottery. Sssshhhh! Don't tell anyone. I don't want the deadbeats coming out of the woodwork wanting to share in my largesse. LOL Anyway, at this rate, I'll be the entire month getting it all done. My back and my heart just aren't into it.

Among my treasures are several 'kits' for making dolls and stuffed animals that I inherited from my mother-in-law. She's been gone for over 35 years so that should tell you something about me. My reluctance to get rid of things also includes things I've had stashed for years and will never finish.

Speaking of never finishing, I have about a dozen lap-size quilt tops I've stored away as well as a plethora of embroidery projects I started probably 30 years ago. I'd try to finish one of them, but I don't think these old hands will hold up anymore. Hand quilting is out.

I came across several books and projects involving crocheting and knitting that I will never touch since I gave up on that years ago. I'd start really well but my stitches would get tighter and tighter until I could no longer get the needle in between the yarn. I gave my yarn and knitting paraphernalia away a few years ago but I still have my embroidery thread. I may as well throw all that in the giveaway pile. I'm sure I'll never use it.

Unfortunately, none of our grandchildren seem to have inherited my propensity for impulse buying new projects and filling a closet so I guess all of it will be going into the pile that I'll be taking to the thrift store to give away.

I've always had a borderline bad memory but when I found the first pair of curtains that I made for the breakfast nook when we moved here and I didn't even remember them, that takes my forgetfulness to a whole new level. I think I'll take my summer curtains down and replace them with these until I'm ready to put up my autumn curtains. If I didn't have procrastination down to a fine art I'd make some for all the holidays and not just two seasons but we all know that answer to that, now don't we?

Dang, I didn't think I could get any ditzier but I guess I can. I took a break to do a little more cleaning and found Christmas curtains I'd forgotten about. I made them last year! I now have Spring, Summer, Fall, and Winter curtains to hang in the breakfast nook. The Christmas curtains can double for Winter so now I'm set until next year when I'm sure I'll forget where I stashed them (or that I even have them). Sigh!