I'm a big technologically challenged person. I love all new gadgets but sometimes I'm ready to pull out what little hair I have left. I'm the type of person who expects something to work properly forever once it's been set up. How can they expect me to remember how to reset something? Once and done, that's me.
Our living room television has been taken over by aliens. When we turn it on, the sound coming out does not match the picture on the screen. What the heck? It's like I'm watching a foreign movie. I tried turning it off and back on. A nice little string of options popped up showing that my television has been hi-jacked by the antenna so the over-the-air programming is talking but I'm looking at a satellite picture. Grabbing the television remote (not to be confused with the satellite remote, the DVD remote, the Apple TV remote, the other DVD remote et al) I have to scroll over to our satellite provider icon and click on it every stinking time I want to watch television.
Apropos my sloth like behavior, I sometimes watch close to (seems like it anyway) 200 hours of television a day. I think I might have a problem. Our satellite guide lists in the vicinity of 2,000 channels, some from as far away as Dallas! Just kidding. Mexico maybe. Who has time to watch it all?
Some of the crazy programs the executives in charge of finding bizarre and/or obscure things to air, since it's hard to fill that many channels, include something my husband stumbled upon yesterday called, well we can't remember the name of it but it involved a bungie cord circle 'net' kind of like one of those bungie cord circle swings we have on our swing set. A player would spike the ball on to the 'net' and another player had to 'catch' it. I don't know what happened after that. I turned to the television to one of the only shows worth watching nowadays– Petticoat Junction.
I've found myself watching more and more of the shows that were aired in the when we were younger. Shows that could be watched in mixed company and by mixed I mean children. Dang, we can't even have our grandchildren in the same room when the commercials come on anymore. What happened to all the censors that wouldn't allow a belly button to be shown on “I Dream of Jeannie”? Now anything goes. They allow WAY too much to be seen. I know. I know, I'm old but modesty and respect never goes out of style.
What was I intending to write about before my mind wandered again? Oh, yeah. Electronics.
As if my television driving me crazy isn't bad enough, I got up yesterday morning, with my cell phone attached to my hand as usual and thought “I'll go buy a new phone today!” My current phone works perfectly fine if you define 'perfectly fine' as won't hold a battery charge to save its life. David is bad about taking over my phone to watch sports since his is a tiny lit tle thing that barely makes calls so he will inherit my perfectly good (Ha) old phone. I can forget about sending him a text. He has no idea how to read one, let alone answer. Anyway, I decided I'd buy a new phone and teach him how to use my old one. What a dreamer I am.
I sauntered into the nearest phone store already knowing which phone I wanted (the most expensive ha ha). Just kidding. This time I was more realistic on my needs and selected a nice upgrade. I also found out that I wouldn't be permitted to 'buy' the phone. I had to add it to my current account for 31 days then on day 32 they would let me pay for it. What the heck? What company refuses money? I bought a protector for the glass front which comes with a lifetime warranty and free replacement and by free replacement they mean they'll charge me a nominal fee ($8!) every time I come in for a replacement.
I had forgotten how long it can take to transfer the information on the old phone to the new phone so I spent the next hour in the store getting everything switched to my new phone. On the upside, the new girl working there and I are now friends.
Unfortunately, being new, she didn't warn me that leaving all the information on my old phone would be a big problem, which it is. Any time my new phone rings, so does my old one.
So it's back to the phone store where, hopefully, my new friend can sort it all out.