I know it's getting to be that time of year, but I sure wish everyone on the popular social media page I stalk...I mean, I check out several times a day would stop reminding me how many days we have left until Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas. We won't discuss New Year's Eve.
Is it me or are the holidays coming faster every year for y'all too? Before we've had a chance to consume the leftover Halloween candy (and by leftover, I mean candy I stashed, ensuring that there'd be some leftover), the stores have their shelves crammed full of Christmas décor and gifts. Who am I kidding? Before the first football kick off, they've already packed the stores with Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas decor.
Remember, as kids, how'd we couldn't wait to get the holiday 'wish book'? We'd pour over it for hours, pretending we'd actually get any of it come Christmas morning. The excitement of the 'wish book' has been replaced with Black Friday.
I've heard rumors that several big box stores and a popular online shopping site aren't waiting until Thanksgiving this year. They're starting in October. October!!
The only fun I ever got out of Black Friday was watching dedicated shoppers who wouldn't miss it for the world. I've seen them run over slower shoppers like myself with their carts to get to the object of their desire before it is sold out. I'm a lousy BF shopper. I will buy anything, no matter the price, just so I will have something for everyone under the tree Christmas morning.
Advertisers may as well come up with another name for Black Friday since they're starting earlier each year. I suggest Oh No It's October and Novocaine November followed by Dramamine December (to quell the sick feeling you get when you open your credit card bills). That might be appropriate for those of us who got through Black Friday heavily medicated and are now forced to spend months dodging sales queens instead.
I'm not ready for all the holiday pre-season nonsense while it's still hot. I just can't get in the mood while I'm suffering from heat stroke.
Back when I was young and still had most of my fully functional brain cells, I didn't have so much trouble. I had not yet earned my official 'Dyed-in-the-wool Couch Potato' gold card. I'd put Donna Reed to shame with my kids' handmade costumes and homemade goodies. I'd leave the candy alone until Halloween was over. Well, most of it. I didn't let David, or the grandkids know where I'd stashed the excess and I never will. I'm still going with 'a thieving band of raccoons broke in and ravaged the candy bowl'.
So anyway, it's time I start planning for our HalloThanksChristNewYea r.
It's too hard for me since that involves planning ahead, something we all know I'm lousy at. I'm get anxious to decorate the house for Christmas as soon as the commercials start but September is way too early, according to those who think I'm insane, aka, my family. What I do is put out a couple of items at a time, so they tend to not notice except for our grandson Eli. He notices everything and will fink on me, the little rascal.
Anyway, as soon as Halloween passes, I have to start dreading the task of Thanksgiving preparations. Sticking my hand up a turkey's behind is not my idea of a good time. I'd feel like a very bad citizen if I didn't have one baking in the oven first thing Thanksgiving morning. I'm sure the Turkey Police would knock on my door, hand me a frozen turkey, and demand that I bake it, right then and there. Do you know how long it takes to bake a frozen turkey? Unfortunately, I do. Don't ask. And NEVER try to fry one. Again, don't ask, just trust me and the local fire department.
If I bake the pies and other goodies too far ahead of time, (like the day before) they don't usually survive. Last year my kitchen ended up looking like those scoundrel raccoons had made another visit. There were empty pie pans, spent cans of whipped cream and crumbs everywhere. Sometimes I don't bother with a plate. David found me on the floor, propped up by a wall, in a sugar stupor, with bits of pie crust on my apron. It was not a pretty sight.
But the one thing I do look forward to during the holidays is spending it with my family. They make it all worthwhile. Well, that and the wine.
I sure as heck wish everyone on the popular social media page, I stalk...I mean, check out every day would stop reminding me how many days until Halloween, Thanksgiving and Christmas.