My Annual (Non) New Year Resolutions

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  • My Annual (Non) New Year Resolutions
    My Annual (Non) New Year Resolutions
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How many of y'all have made your yearly resolutions (aka lies we tell ourselves)? How many of y'all have already broken your New Year resolutions? How many, like me, said this year I resolve to not make any resolutions I can't keep (translation: none). See? I've already broken my no resolution objective by resolving to not make any resolutions. Is lying to myself every year by resolving to not make any resolutions, the same as making a resolution? This could get very confusing.

So anyway I broke my non-resolution vow within a day and a half when I started promising myself I'd stop losing things or forgetting things. Is that the same as making a resolution? Probably since it amounts to the same thing – lying to myself.

I tried starting the year off right. I followed the South American tradition of eating 12 grapes which are supposed to give one good luck all year long. (I draw the line at eating black-eyed peas. (Good luck is relative. Are you a "the glass is half full" or "the glass is half empty" kind of person? I'm a half-full person and ready for a refill.)

Getting organized is another non-resolution I make every year. It never happens. Surprise, surprise but it makes me feel good to think it could happen this year. One of my problems is I've got too much stuff and not enough space. I compare it to buying elasticwaisted pants or large purses. I tend to expand to my environment so it wouldn't matter how big my house was – I'd fill it up anyway. My craft closet is so full of fabric and craft supplies I don't remember I own that I can't get into it. It would put "Fibber McGee's" closet to shame. (Google Fibber McGee's closet.)

We won't even discuss all the boxes I've crammed into my office that are awaiting undecoration day. We try to undecorate by Valentine's Day. Just kidding but not by much. Ha Ha! I'd leave it up yearround and decorate it differently for each month if it weren't for two things. (1) We don't have the room and (2) David would stuff me in the box with the tree. I wouldn't mind if he's doing the undecorating, but the attic gets cold this time of year.

Every year I promise myself I'll take the time to organize my Christmas decorations by documenting the contents on the side of the box so I can pick one up and know immediately what treasures it holds. I carry the boxes into the living room and start organizing. This lasts about half an hour before my patience (of which I have none) runs out and I start tossing it all in, just to get it done.

I do hate taking everything down and putting it away for a couple of reasons: (1) Because it makes the house look so bleak and (2) I'm basically lazy and hate putting anything back where it belongs. This includes but is not limited to laundry, dishes, groceries, Halloween decorations, the Christmas tree, and enough decorations to fill two hous es crammed into one. (Which explains my office. I call it controlled chaos; David just shakes his head and refuses to enter.)

My most recent non-resolution, as I mentioned last week, is a vow to not click 'buy now' until I have checked and doublechecked to make sure how many of one item I have in my virtual shopping cart. Imagine my surprise when I received six of an obscure tool I intended to purchase two of. I managed to get rid of five but I'm still trying to figure out what to do with the last one. I also noticed that one of my kids left one here when they gathered their presents. I'm sure it was an accident and they'll be missing it soon.

I also ended up with a new Ninja blender. I didn't realize I'd bought it until it showed up on my doorstep. I had heard that our phones and computers are spying on us. Do we now have to worry that they're also purchasing items we happen to read about on the internet? My sister showed me her new printer for printing on cups, plates, etc and, what do you know? Facebook suddenly had a post about the very printer she showed me. Hey, those of you listening in, I don't have any of that equipment and don't intend to purchase any of it anytime soon. I kept the blender anyway because, hey, who can resist a blender that can make smoothies and cook soup too? With my new blender maybe I'll finally make and eat black-eyed peas next year. But probably not.

Here's to a Happy New Year. Cheers!